Chill Out

Mindful practice invites us to set aside our interpretations of situations and to focus on the phenomena that comprise them. This approach sharply contrasts with how we typically spend our waking hours, often fixating on what things mean and whether we like them or not.

Jon Kabat-Zinn defines mindfulness as "the awareness that arises from paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally, in the service of self-understanding and wisdom."¹

The term "nonjudgmentally" in this definition often confuses people. He doesn’t imply that noticing unpleasant sights, sounds, sensations, thoughts, or feelings means you’re not being mindful. Instead, he suggests that with practice, the awareness we bring to any phenomenon can become more neutral.

It is not judgmental to notice the presence of pain. For example, you can be mindfully aware of a headache, as well as mindful of when the discomfort subsides.

The challenge lies in trying to experience what hurts without automatically categorizing it as a problem, even if only for a brief moment. While the pain remains, our resistance to it can diminish, even if just slightly.

At times, we direct our attention toward uncomfortable experiences. Other times, we focus on more pleasant experiences while allowing discomfort to play out in the background. Neither approach is judgmental nor seeks to downplay physical or emotional pain. Both approaches help us distinguish between discomfort itself and our immediate reactions to it.

Depending on your location, summer provides ample opportunity to explore these options. For instance, when you find yourself in a hot environment, take a moment to notice how it feels to be hot in that moment. Is the heat uniform throughout your body, or can you detect variations in intensity?

If you're sweating, can you feel any coolness where the air comes into contact with the moisture your body has produced to help regulate your temperature?

Similarly, we often describe emotionally charged situations as feeling "heated," which can lead to a similar exploration when experiencing frustration or defensiveness. Ask yourself: Is the heat uniform throughout your body, or are there variations? Are there areas that do not signal emotional discomfort?

People frequently report feeling unpleasant emotions in the central areas of their bodies, such as the face, throat, chest, abdomen, and pelvis. When you're in the midst of an argument, a difficult conversation, or facing deadline pressure at work, which of your emotional centers indicates that there is a problem?

Even amid anger, sadness, or grief, it can be helpful to acknowledge the parts of your body that feel emotionally neutral, such as your arms, hands, legs, feet, and back.

To understand ourselves better and relate more effectively to the full range of our emotional reactions, it helps to remember that noticing when something hurts doesn't eject us from contemplative practice. Depending on the kind of attention we decide to bring to the challenge, it can be evidence of a willingness to become more discerning and less reactive.

There is no universally correct response to pain, but there can be a sense of freedom in consciously deciding to either witness it as objectively as we can or do our best to let it run its course in the background.

Taking the choice off autopilot can be enough to change existing patterns and alter our ability to respond in the present and the future.

Exercise

This exercise enhances your ability to notice the soothing sensations that are easily overlooked in a range of uncomfortable situations.

Circumstances for learning this attention exercise

• feeling a little bored

• chilling on a cool summer morning

• when things are heating up physically or emotionally