6 Things I'm Bringing with Me into 2025
Going deeper into what's working without waiting for distractions to go away.
The seductive pull of time-wasting noise was strong last year, and I assume it will only get stronger. Instead of waiting for the algorithms to ease up on me, I plan to continue doing what has worked so far: sharpening my ability to detect and focus on the empowering signals.
1. Insights and exercises from Mark Freeman’s You Are Not a Rock
I don't remember when Mark Freeman's quotes about mental habits started popping up in my Instagram feed, but his perspective stood out. Unlike the endless stream of catchy yet unhelpful quotes about the mind, his perspective resonated with my experience of trying to observe my thoughts over the years using impactful mindful awareness strategies.
My interest only increased after watching several YouTube videos describing how he's learned to deal with compulsive thoughts. His ideas passed my bullshit detector, so I read his book in March.
I was not prepared for its impact. It has changed how I shop, order at restaurants, pack for vacation, and run errands. It has also changed how I prepare, present, and review feedback. It has improved the quality of my relationships with the people I'm closest to and provided new ways to set limits with challenging people.
This is a work in progress, but the results are tangible. It has given me new tools for applying the mindful awareness skills I've been consistently cultivating for twenty-two years—tools I've never come across before.
I'm double-checking less, catching mental traps sooner, and steering around them more often. I can't think of a book that has had a greater impact on how I feel inside.
When we talk about mental health, most of the focus is on mental illness. Mark is contributing to what I'm trying to address: strengthening mental, emotional, and attentional fitness to make daily life feel more alive without waiting for painful psychological symptoms to motivate us to begin.
I plan to reread You Are Not a Rock this month.
Have you read it? Plan to? I'd love to hear your reactions.
2. A powerful time-blocking strategy from David Cain's How to Do Things
Like my mindfulness colleague David Cain, I've experimented with countless productivity and time management tips over the years. While many seemed promising, most did not lead to an effective, sustainable process.
I had mostly accepted the paradoxical insights of Oliver Burkeman's work (which I highly recommend), but many of David's ideas have resonated with me over time. After reading about his approach on the Raptitude blog, I decided to try it.
David suggests working in twenty-five-minute blocks of uninterrupted time with short breaks in between. This method seemed too simple to be effective, but it has transformed how I approach my projects. It's less rigid than other scheduling techniques and builds on the Pomodoro Technique, but it is much more manageable.
It strikes the perfect balance between being strict about focused work and being flexible regarding the number of blocks to complete. I’m becoming more realistic about what I can achieve in these short intervals by clarifying my goals before starting the timer.
I’ve often used my first block of the day to generate a list of the tasks I need to prioritize and break the big ones into smaller subtasks.
This practice has made me aware of how much time I've spent meandering for hours instead of concentrating on what I can accomplish in under thirty minutes. Additionally, it has enhanced my mindfulness by helping me resist distractions for challenging but realistic durations.
David's book, How to Do Things, is only fifty pages and more than worth twenty-five dollars. I noticed a difference in how I spent my work time from the first experiment he guided me through. His clear and efficient writing style inspires me to become clearer and more concise in the attention exercises I share with others.
Check it out!
3. Homework for Life by Matthew Dicks
I first heard master storyteller Matthew Dicks describe this daily habit for becoming a better storyteller on an episode of The Gist with Mike Pesca in August 2015. I’ve explored it off and on since that time.
Here’s how he described it back then:
“When I talk to people about finding stories in their life, I’m talking about finding things that are almost in their everyday that they can bring great meaning to and connect to audiences or to people around the lunch table with.
I do an exercise every day. So here’s what I do.
Every night, I sit down before I go to bed. I ask myself, If I had to tell a five-minute story about something that happened today, what would that story be?
I track through my day—starting from beginning to end—and I find the moment in my day that has the greatest meaning. And then I write it down.
I write it down in an Excel spreadsheet in between five and twenty words. Short. Not much commitment at all. Sometimes it takes me one minute to do this.
And here’s what happens.
Over time, you start to refine your lens as a storyteller. And you start to see your life through story. And even if you’re not a storyteller, I tell people this, whether they’re doing storytelling with me or not: It will—I promise you—change your life.
Because…if I ask you what you did last Thursday, you won’t remember. You hear all the time how life is passing you by, it goes by so fast, I can’t believe how quickly that year went by. I’m here to tell you that, Life goes by, for me, very slowly.
It is a step-by-step, daily process. Because every night, I sit down, and I find something that made that day different than all the rest and I record it. The act of recording it, records the moment forever. It allows me to go back to that moment. And then as I do it ever day, my lens for storytelling becomes more and more refined.
The question I ask myself, because I’m a storyteller, is if I had to stand on a stage and tell a five-minute story about something that happened today, what would be the five-minute story I would tell? What moment in the day would I be forced to use?
If you actually do this, your past memories will float to the surface very quickly. So you do something with your child, and suddenly you remember the moment when you were a child and this similar thing happened.
If you don’t record it, if you don’t get it down, it’s lost forever.”
To learn more about Matthew Dicks, watch his TED talks (Live Life Like You’re 100-Years Old and Homework for Life), listen to his storytelling podcast, and read his books.
Storyworthy is one of the best books I’ve ever read about the craft of storytelling and Matt has been building a library of related tutorials and resources on the new Storyworthy site.
As many people describe with mindfulness practice or physical exercise, I never regret investing time in Homework for Life, but I find myself drifting away from it for extended intervals.
Attentional fitness, physical exercise, and becoming a better storyteller are worth revisiting as many times as necessary.
What skills and habits do you feel this way about?
4. The Interfering Neurotic podcast with Dr. Ash King
Ash King and I connected through social media. While working on her PhD in Psychology, she stumbled upon my TED talk, Don’t Try to Be Mindful, which is included in the first week of a free online version of a Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction course.
Despite the hellacious time difference between Australia and Ohio, we connected several times over Zoom. After she graduated, we started tossing around the idea of developing a podcast about navigating the curses and blessings of living with big feelings.
Life got in the way, but we recorded our first conversation in October and five more since then. They’re available on all the usual podcast platforms and Ash’s YouTube channel. I’ve also been posting them here on Substack.
How to Talk So Non-Neurotics Will Listen is coming soon
The title comes from a line from The Doors of Perception by Aldous Huxley:
“For the moment the interfering neurotic who, in waking hours, tries to run the show, was blessedly out of the way.”
5. Masters swimming led by a coach
My spouse is a lifelong swimmer. He discovered a swim tourism company based in the UK that hosts open-water swimming trips worldwide. Instead of missing the chance to travel to warm, beautiful parts of the world, I started to train for vacation three years ago when our grandson was born.
We’ve been on five trips so far. He’s always one of the strongest swimmers in the group, and I do my best to keep up with the less experienced folks. A few months before our last trip, we signed up for a local masters swimming club. This means that two or three times a week now, I’m in the pool at 5:45 a.m., splashing around outside my comfort zone, trying not to drown while developing a more efficient stroke.
It’s one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I’m not very good at it, and I’m surrounded by people who are. What kind of people get up this early?! Interesting, disciplined people, it turns out. They’re very welcoming, and the coach is too competent for me to phone my laps in quietly.
I’m surprised at how much stronger my swimming is already, but I feel intimidated by the slow pace of my observable progress. I’m working to apply mindful awareness to my tendency to brace myself for what’s coming instead of focusing on what I’m doing. This applies to learning how to do a flip turn but also to undermining the lap I’m currently swimming with anxious feelings about not being able to complete a practice set or the whole workout.
It’s a great reminder that being outside your comfort zone can be so uncomfortable.
6. Monthly video summaries using the 1 Second Everyday app
I discovered the 1 Second Everyday app five years ago and captured a second most days between birthdays. My daughter used it to capture seconds throughout the first year of our grandson’s life.
I started compiling monthly summaries to post on Instagram in January 2023. I’m so glad I started this project and am excited to continue it this year. It helps me anticipate unexpected moments and combat the blindness of familiarity.
The seconds I capture aren’t selfies of me doing extraordinary things. They’re about capturing a few glimpses of my life each month while savoring the countless moments that aren’t being documented.
Love that the pod gets a mention! It's been a real highlight for me from last year too and I'm excited to journey into this year with more fun and insightful topics. Also just grabbed You Are Not A Rock. Looking forward to discussing.
So many good things in here! Reminders of books to read — especially You Are Not a Rock — and things I want to try out.